Are you a fixer and a doer?

By Rocio Morales

I think in the modern world, most of us are. We live an a society where it is expected to come up with solutions or ways to fix things.
If a kid comes to you with a bruise, you will look for a way to clean the affected area and then put a band-aid to where the bruise is. If a friend tells another friend about her problem, you would hear the listener suggesting ways to solve the issue almost automatically.

We are use to do and fix, and when life challenges in some situations where regardless of the impulse to act, the effect is minimal; such experience becomes an an interesting one and a wonderful opportunity to grow.

Some years ago my grandmother passed away, she was without a doubt the link between all the family, her presence and kindness hold the family together. When she passed, all that connection changed and hasn't been the same since then. A result of her passing, my mother went into a severe depression and no matter what we tried to do or say she was going downfall. Watching her in this state made me realize the little control we have over those we love.
After trying different approaches (and spending time and resources trying to "fix her") my siblings, and myself realized that she needed time to break the cycle of depression and came out of it at her own time and terms. I am happy to report that she did.

There is an old Zen proverb that applies to this experience: "Sitting quietly, doing nothing, spring comes, and the grass grows by itself"

Yoga allows you to experience this type of situations not only at a physical but also at a mental level and even spiritually. For instance if your hamstrings are tight, no matter what you do, they will take time to lengthen. Forcing those muscles to lengthen, will injure them and the healing process can be long. On the other hand if you have a good disposition, meaning you will allow your body to open and feel OK when some people can bend and touch the floor and you can't even pass you knees, the body little by little will open. At a physical level Yoga helps to remove the old habits and open an space in your body for those muscles to relax and lengthen.

At a mental level Yoga gives you the opportunity to watch your mind and all the stuff that is in there when you go into a pose, are you too competitive that every pose is a challenge to be master forcefully? or do you acknowledge the restrictions in your body and keep working with them without feeling embarrassed.?

Next time before jumping to fixing and doing, resist the impulse and listen more, be open to possibilities and let go of the desire to control or to make everything perfect. To me that is one of the biggest gifts I have received from my yoga practice. Not everything is about doing and fixing, many times is better to let go, decide not to become a victim and open a space to heal and grow with the resources we have at hand at this moment, the present where we have more control over our life.

Sitting doing nothing Spring will come...